Who Controls Your Fate? "Internal" Personality vs. "External" Personality
Who controls your fate? Or more accurately, who do you believe
controls your fate? One dimension along which people vary is how
much they believe that they alone control what happens to them.
Those who feel that their own efforts make a positive difference in
getting the job, mate, etc. that they want, are known as
"internals". Those who believe that nothing they do will even
make a difference, that their life is controlled by fate, luck, or
other people, are known as "externals".
Differences Between Internals And Externals
Internals and externals differ in many important ways. Generally,
internals are more active, alert, and task-oriented in their attempts
to manipulate and control their world. Externals tend to feel
that nothing they can do will make a difference. They have no
choice but to sit back and take whatever fate hands to them.
In general,
externals have a tough time of it. They tend to be somewhat
neurotic, resentful, suspicious of others, irritable, depressed, and
low in self-esteem. This is not to say that internals cannot have
their share of psychological problems because they certainly can, but
externals do in fact tend to view the world as a threatening and
hostile place, and they tend to feel that nothing they can do will make
it better. It is indeed a frightening way to view life.
You Can Change A "Lifetime Of Training"
As is the case with most personality characteristics, internals and
externals are trained to be the way they are while they are growing
up. It is always hard to change a lifetime of training, and it
will take a considerable effort, but you can do it if you try! It
is not a matter of luck or powerful people controlling the way you
are. If you find yourself thinking that nothing you can do will
improve your situation, stop yourself. Try to think about other
people who face similar circumstances and were able to make a
difference by making an effort. Think about specific strategies
you could employ. Ask your friends for advice about what you
might do. Point out to yourself everytime your efforts do result
in a favorable outcome, and remind yourself of these occasions
frequently. The truth is that there are some things that we
really cannot control, but it is also true that simply by believing
that our efforts will make a difference, we can lead happier, more
satisfying lives.

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